A strange older guy once told one of my employees that if he wanted to start dating a girl, he needed to simply ask her what her passion was. This would spur a conversation more deeper than most, he would get to know her in a more personal manner and show that he wasn't interested in solely having sex with her. Unfortunately for this guy, the girl he asked answered that her passion was sex. Awkward. But anyways, passion is something I once had a heated discussion with and would like to share with my readers today.
My passion is writing, obviously, as well as singing, reading, doing anything creative mostly. My boyfriend's passion is running. Once I was discussing with someone that my boyfriends passion is one thing that I allow him to love more than me (not that I have to permit him to love something, but only that I believe it is acceptable for one to love their passion more than the person they are with). The person I was discussing this with found my declaration ludicrous. He said that when you are with someone you are supposed to love them first and foremost. I disagree. I find that the thing that you are passionate about most, is what makes you who you are. How can you truly love someone if you do not love who you are? I think this is impossible. I also believe that writing has been something that has always been my passion, whereas it is very rare that you find the love of your life before you find your passion. If something would happen to me and my boyfriend, writing would still be there for me, it will always be there for me. Also, my boyfriend loves me for who I am, and I am a writer, so if I didn't nurture my passion, then it would make him be in love with someone who does not exist.
I find the best example to explain what I mean is using the military. When someone enlists in the service it is because of their love of their country. Serving their country becomes their passion. Because of this they must leave their family behind, but in a sense they are still protecting their family. The two loves work together, but ultimately the person's passion comes first and foremost. It doesn't mean he loves his family any less, it is simply that his passion makes him the person that he is. Without his passion, and him choosing his passion first, he may not be the man that his family loves so much.
I feel like putting your passion first is important. You must tend to the person you are before you can be loved. As long as your passion does not become obsession, then I think it can help create a healthy relationship.